oh vino.

I am drinking a great merlot right now. It is called 'genesis'. by hogue cellars. i enjoy hogue. they make a good red.
My director asked us to write bios for the program, and to include a personal quote that we ourselves have said. I called at least three friends asking what quote they thought of when they thought of me. no one came up with anything. I can't even come up with anything. I know things I'd like to say I've said, things I wish I'd have come up with first...Nothing that is witty (or appropriate) enough to put in a theatre program. What sums me up, what have I said that means something to me? This assignment is not that big of a deal; it wasn't meant to be. I always overanalyze. Speaking of which.
Did you smoke some reefer today?

Give Thanks

themed band-aids

grassy hills

my moms perfume clinique happy

red tulips

that new-book-smell

teachers that smile when you answer correctly

crunchy firm grapes

curtains from the 70's and 80's

puppies with extra skin and soft fur

playgrounds with tires rooted in the ground

construction workers that smile and wave

crayons

retro coasters

people that hold doors for you

that way he looks at me and smiles with his teeth

my niece's hands

my little unborn baby girl niece

yellow umbrellas

birds with lilting calls

thick black markers that ooze ink

my grandma's wedding pictures

the way you write my name

tableclothes

classified ads that read, "i noticed you, did you notice me?"

the place between your shoulder and neck

smooth round rocks on the beach

falling asleep outside

Do You Have The Time?

Recently my Grandma passed away, so we've been circling her house like vultures and picking through the remains. I probably could've worded that better. I've found some interesting things. Receipts from the drugstore in the 60's, pins shaped like huge neon flowers, a golden sewing case for your purse (Just in case! Everyone was like a girlscout in the 50's; prepared for any minor disaster.) But best of all was my grandpa's old pocket watch. I pulled it out of the box and following after it, attached by a golden chain, was a pocket knife! What the hell? Why do you need a weapon on your timepiece? It was really sharp too! Not a little, innocent, I-also-may-be-a-miniature-pair-of-scissors-knife, no; this was a wicked golden blade of fury.

"Do you have the time?"

"Oh sure let me just reach in my pocket here IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO GET STABBED MOFO!"

Oh, The Things We Shall See!

Things To See Today:

- A woman sitting at Taco Del Mar with the same purse as I, and upon seeing this, quickly stowing it under the table in humiliation.
- Two mice screaming at each other in angry mouse voices and wrestling in their food bowl at the pet store.
- A fish kissing its own reflection.
- A car racing by in the parking lot, blaring Bulgarian trance music.
- The cherry blossoms in front of my house blooming in the sun.
- My brother walking across my lawn in a leg cast, playing the accordian while dressed in flannel and one birkenstock.

CAN I GET A QUOTE

On Tuesday, when I was sick and sweating my fever out in the limited comfort of my bed, I was having the most whacked out fever dreams. The kind you don't wake up from even when you're conscious. The night before, I was reading a political chic lit my sister lent me about a woman having an affair with a politician in D.C, (She loves to drop really vapid, meaningless novella's about bored housewives and 30 something's on me, so i have to take them to the Goodwill instead of her.) and somehow it invaded my thoughts and dreams. Reporters were crowding me from all sides, pushing and screaming, "CAN I GET A QUOTE, HOW WILL THIS AFFECT YOUR CAMPAIGN, WHICH ISSUE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT TO YOUR PARTY?!" I floundered around wildly in my covers, trying to find an answer that wouldn't come out in the headlines the next day. When I finally did awaken, my fever was still so high that the reporters voices continued to ring in my ears. "Please...Stop..." I pleaded, covering my head with my pillow. I'm not really sure what the issues were that my party stood for, so i still don't have a quote.

Cause' I'm Freeeee

“Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn’t there the first time you need him, chances are you won’t be needing him again.”
-TheJSpot.org

Soup

I am having, hands down, the worst week of my life. Although it doesn't really feel like the worst week. In fact, I can recall being in a much fouler mood on weeks when nothing had happened. As opposed to this week, in which my grandma has died, I've had the worst flu of all time, and oral surgery (I HATE people in my mouth. Make a joke; I dare you.).
Tangent about the oral surgery: The reason I'm going in for this; the many years ago when they put on my braces, my orthodontist decided to make a space in my teeth, to push together all the little spaces. So all these little spaces accumulate into one tooth-sized space. So i need a fake tooth. I am planning on one that is gold with a shiny diamond in it.
My doctor. Possibly the most irritating person alive. He is an oral surgeon, so of course he has these bright shiny chompers he likes to flash at you when you're lying there, prone and helpless under the bright lights. Last time I was there for a checkup, he had a tongue depressor down my throat and he goes, "So I was gonna take my kids to that pirate movie. But I didn't."
'Why (insane) doctor?' Why are you making small-talk when you have a tongue depressor down my throat?
'Cause it was rated Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!'
So I choke on the tongue depressor. This time around, as they are putting me under and getting the IV going; 'Hey, your heart's beating kind of fast! Are you nervous? You know what we have for nervous patients?! THIS TEDDY BEAR!'
I would like to state for the record that I am a legal adult.

But I'm actually feeling kind of peppy. Is this because I know that it can't get any worse? When you have a funeral scheduled for your weekend, you're not leaving the house because you're coughing your lungs up and chugging daytime sudafed to numb the pain, and you take nighttime sudafed to dull your mind, how can it get any worse?

My favorite food is Soup. Soup is amazing. It's an appetizer, it's an entree, it's a whole meal! The jack-of-all-trades of food. If only we could all just be a little more like Soup.

No wonder my favorite book was Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs when I was younger.
I seem to have a wierd personal relationship with the food I consume.

Cheddar Tomato Soup Loves You Long Time
12 whole fresh tomatoes
2 small onions-- chopped
1/2 cup diced celery
1 cup chicken stock
1 cup cream
1 teaspoon ground
basil
salt
black pepper
8 ounces cheddar cheese -- shredded

Combine tomatoes, onions, and celery in food processor and blend until coarsely chopped. Pour into large sauce pan, add chicken stock, and bring to a boil over medium heat. Simmer, uncovered, for 20 minutes. Add cream. Season with basil, salt, and pepper. Cook over very low heat for five minutes. Add cheese and cook, stirring constantly, until cheese melts. Serve at once.